Fight to Survive
by LittleBritishPerson
Summary: When a colleague dies from injuries. Another colleague looks back on how it happened. *May contain some upsetting writing.*
1. Chapter 1

"Come on. Stay with me. Please." Cal begged as he performed chest compressions on someone as their heart flatlined.

Connie was on the defibrillator and Charlie stood by in case he was needed.

"Charging, 150. Clear." Connie warned as Cal stepped back. The body jolted as Connie pressed the button. No output still. Cal quickly continued chest compressions.

"Charing again. 150. Clear." Connie repeated as Cal once again stepped back. The body jolted again but they were still struggling to revive the casualty.

The kept going for forty minutes, still refusing to give up on this casualty.

"We're gonna have to call it soon." Charlie spoke softly in Connie's ear.

"He's lost so much blood." Connie whispered. As she looked at Cal. "He's losing more blood then we can get in." Cal looked up at Connie as he kept performing compressions.

"No! We are not giving up. Get me 10 grams of adrenaline." Cal demanded but no one was moving. "What are you doing?" Cal almost snapped.

"Cal-" Connie placed a hand over the trolley onto Cal's arm as she was interrupted by Cal.

"We can't give up." Cal gritted his teeth in anger.

"He's gone." Connie continued as she lightly gripped Cal's arm. Cal slowed down on chest compressions, looked down at the casualty then back at Connie. Tears forming in his eyes.

"Time of death 21.06." Connie confirmed the death as Cal stepped back slowly removing his gloves. He threw them to the side then stormed out the room with Charlie and Connie watching the door then looking back down at the deceased as he laid there with shirtless and with a tracheal tube:

Ethan.

 **Just a short chapter to get things started. Don't worry, this is the first chapter. I'm just being a bit creative but yes, this story, it will a bit upsetting as I want to do something different so I apologise in advance. I will understand if you may not want to read it as it involves a much loved favourite suffering a bit, but I will try and promise to lift some spirits throughout the story.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey all!**

 **Thank you for the reviews, follows and favourites on the first chapter. Glad you like it, was worried you wouldn't!**

 **I know lot of people go back to school either today or the Monday that just went, so hope you are having an okay week settling back in : )**

 ** _Five hours earlier._**

Ethan stood at the admin station in the middle of cubicles. Cal sneaked up behind him, placing a hand on Ethan's shoulder. Ethan jumped slightly.

"Hey Nibbles." Cal smiled as he walked round the side of Ethan.

"What do you want?" Ethan asked as he looked into the computer. Cal pretended to be offended.

"Oh, nice. You assume I only speak to you if I want you." Cal smirked, Ethan stared at him with a raised eyebrow. "Shut up." Cal lightly pushed Ethan's head to the side. Ethan smiled a little. "But I do need your help with a patient."

"You need help?" Ethan asked, confused.

"Funny." Cal spoke sarcastically. "No, seriously. Just need a second opinion. I've been trying to diagnose this patient but he's a bit quiet and won't anything so I was wondering if you could try and get him to talk, since you have a more patient approached." Cal spoke.

"Right okay. I'll see what I can do." Ethan spoke as he took the folder off Cal and walked to cubicle 4 with Cal following.

"Hello there, I'm Dr Hardy. You must be..." Ethan looked at the folder for a name. "Peter Tracey." Ethan smiled. The quiet man nodded.

"Dr Knight tells me that you don't want to talk about your symptoms. Are you embarrassed?" Ethan asked. Peter didn't answer.

"Mate, the sooner you tell us, the sooner you can leave." Cal sighed in annoyance. Ethan turned around the face Cal.

"Dr Knight." Ethan frowned at him.

"Sorry." Cal spoke. Ethan looked back at Peter. He eventually nodded to Ethan's question.

"Mr Tracey was admitted a few months back with headaches. They found a tumour which was benign." Cal spoke to Ethan.

"Okay and Peter do you have a headache now?" Ethan asked. Peter shook his head sideways.

"You're getting more information than I could." Cal spoke.

"It's all about being patient." Ethan spoke at Cal whilst he looked at Peter. "Right, Peter you don't have to say but can you point to where it hurts?" The man pointed to his back.

"Can I have a look?" Ethan asked, the man nodded and lifted his shirt up as Ethan went round, behind the man. Cal stood there, confused as to why Ethan can suddenly get answers. He didn't think it would of been that easy.

"Okay, there is some slight bruising." Ethan stated as Peter put his shirt back down. "Do you remember how it happened?" Ethan asked. Peter shook his head sideways.

"Okay. No worries. I'm pretty confident there's no serious damage. Just mild bruising." Ethan smiled, then walked off, Cal walked with him.

"And I though David was quiet." Cal whispered. "So he's okay to be discharged?" Cal asked as Ethan went back to the computer.

"I would think so." Ethan answered as he looked into the screen.

"Thanks Nibbles." Cal patted him on the back then walked back to the cubicle.

Two hours later, Ethan walked out the ED for his break. He looked to his left and noticed Peter sitting in the garden area. Ethan walked over to him.

"Peter?" Peter looked up at Ethan. Ethan sat next to him. "You were discharged ages ago." Peter still didn't speak, he continued to look ahead of him. "Do you not want to go home?" Peter shook his head sideways.

"I'm sorry Cal, er, Dr Knight was a bit hard on you. He's like that sometimes." Ethan smiled lightly. Peter looked at him.

"You close with him?" Peter finally spoke. Ethan was a little surprised.

"You could say that." Ethan sighed. "He's my brother."

"I had a brother. He died here." Peter spoke.

"Is that why you were quiet in there?" Ethan asked. Peter nodded. "Peter, I'm so sorry."

"Staff were very kind." Peter spoke.

"Peter. Is that why you came here? Not because of your injuries but because you felt close to this place since your brother passed?" Ethan asked.

"See, you understand. Not everyone does." Peter spoke. Ethan didn't know what to say but he was glad to get Peter talking. "Thank you, Doctor. You are a good one. Unlike your brother." Peter spoke.

"Yes, well, he's not always as patient as me." Ethan spoke then looked at his watch. "I better head back in. Will you be okay?" Ethan asked as he stood up.

"Yes. Thank you Doctor." Peter softly spoke up at Ethan.

Ethan smiled at him then walked back into the ED with Peter staring at him strangely.

 **Is Peter involved somehow? Hmm.**

 **Sorry there is no action in this but you need it to understand the dramatic stuff. I will pick it up on the next chapter : )**


	3. Chapter 3

Ethan walked slowly into the ED. Lost in thought from his chat with Peter. Cal walked up to him.

"Ethan? You okay?" Cal asked. Ethan looked back at the door.

"Yes. I'm fine." Ethan spoke softly as he then looked back at Cal before walking to cubicles. Cal followed him.

"What's the matter? You look lost." Cal stated.

"Just spoke to an upset patient. That's all." Ethan smiled then went into the staffroom to take off his Navy Holby City hoodie whilst Cal stayed in cubicles.

An hour and a half later, Cal walked into reception and saw Peter walking up to him.

"Peter Tracey? You were discharged ages ago. What's wrong?" Cal asked as he shut a folder on the reception desk.

"He doesn't deserve a brother like you. Ethan." Peter spoke. Cal was taken back by Peter's sudden speaking.

"I'm sorry?" Cal spoke, confused.

"He's kind and considerate. You on the other hand." Peter scoffed.

"Okay, Peter. What's this really about?" Cal asked.

"Do you not remember me, Caleb?" Peter asked. Cal looked at him confused. "We went to Holby High together. Same year, you picked on me constantly." Peter spoke.

"You need a psych assessment, mate." Cal spoke then began to walk away.

"I am not your mate!" Peter shouted as he pulled out a gun from his pocket. Cal turned around and froze on the spot while the reception quickly evacuated as they panicked. Noel ducked under his desk.

At the admin desk in cubicles, Ethan raised his head to sound of shouting. A worried Charlie ran in to the cubicles.

"Charlie, what is it?" Connie asked.

"Some man is pointing a gun at Cal." Charlie answered then he noticed Ethan turn round to face him. "Ethan I'm so sorry." Charlie regretted his answer. Without thinking, Ethan walked past Charlie. "Ethan." Charlie tried to stop Ethan. "Ethan!" Charlie almost shouted after Ethan as he left cubicles.

Ethan slowly walked out of cubicles. He could see the back of Cal.

"Peter?" Ethan spoke softly as he came into Peter's view.

"Ethan. I'm sorry I know he's your brother but he has to pay for what he's done." Peter spoke.

"What do you mean? What has he done?" Ethan asked as he got a little closer to Cal.

"Your brother is a vindictive bully." Peter angered.

"I know he is. But why are you pointing a gun at him?" Ethan asked.

"I was a victim Ethan. I was a victim of his ways back in school." Peter answered.

"I don't doubt that, Peter. But is this really the way?" Ethan asked. Peter didn't answer. "Your brother wouldn't want you to do this." Ethan could see Peter loosening his grip on the gun. "You don't want to do this." Ethan smiled lightly.

"I'll get arrested." Peter spoke.

"I won't let that happen. We can get you help. Me and you. Okay? Just put the gun down." Ethan held a hand up. Peter lowered his gun. Ethan walked up to Cal. "Are you okay?" Ethan asked Cal.

"Yeah. Yeah I'm fine." Cal spoke. The two boys looked at Peter who was looking down, ashamed.

"Okay, come on. Let's go." Ethan whispered. He walked back to cubicles with Cal following.

But suddenly Ethan heard a sound. The sound of a hand gun cocking. He turned his head and saw Peter lifting his gun back up at Cal.

"Cal!" Ethan shouted as he pushed Cal out the way of the gun as the shot fired. Ethan fell back against the reception counter. He placed a hand on his side and saw blood all over his hand and scrubs. Once he stood back up straight, Cal looked at Ethan in horror. Ethan looked at Cal before collapsing to the ground. Security ran over and pinned Peter down.

"No!" Cal shouted as he ran and kneeled down to his brother. He lifted half of Ethan's body whilst applying his hand on Ethan's wound for pressure as all of their colleagues came into view. "Ethan. Ethan talk to me." Cal lightly tapped Ethan in the face. Ethan opened his eyes at Cal. "That's it. Stay awake. You're going to be fine. Okay?" Cal sniffed back a tear. Connie and Charlie ran to his side whilst everyone else watched in horror.

"I'm fine. I'm fine." Ethan whispered.

"Ethan. Listen, you've been shot but it's going to be okay. You're going to be fine." Cal repeated. Ethan's adrenaline was leaving him. He now started to feel the pain. Connie lifted Ethan's scrub shirt a little and saw the bullet hole in Ethan's side.

"It hurts." Ethan continued to whisper.

"I know it does. Don't try and speak." Cal cradled his little brother.

"Cal." Ethan whispered.

"Sssh, it'll be alright." Cal's voice broke from tears as he placed his blood hand on Ethan's face.

"Looks like the bullet hit his spleen. I need to get him to small resus to find out more." Connie spoke as she looked at Ethan's side. Cal quickly picked Ethan's dead weight body up in a bridal style and quickly rushed him to the small resus with his colleagues opening the doors for him. Cal quickly placed Ethan on a trolley as Connie began to asses him quickly.

 **Better leave it here. Added a little plot twist with Cal and Peter because I wanted a reason for Peter to want to try and lash out at Cal, so hope that was okay.**

 **Originally Ethan being shot was suppose to be in Chapter four but had other ideas. Will most likely release Chapter four tomorrow or Saturday. See you then.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey all,**

 **Finished work early so thought I would get chapter 4 written up and uploaded. Hope you like it : )**

Cal waited outside small resus as Connie told him to stay there while Ethan was being assessed.

"Cal." Connie stuck her head out the door. "We will be taking him up to theatre but you can see him at the moment. He's very weak though." Cal trembled a shaky breath. Cal slowly walked into small resus and stood by Ethan's side. He held his hand. Charlie and Connie walked outside and gave them a moment.

"Don't you ever do that again." Cal broke a tear. Ethan slowly opened his eyes tiredly at Cal.

"You saved my life." Cal whispered back whilst a tear ran down his face. "When you're better, we will take some time off. Go up to see the Stonehenge. Remember we went there when we were kids?" Cal spoke happy memories. Ethan listened without any expression.

"Cal. Theatre are ready for him." Connie smiled lightly.

"Okay." Cal smiled at Connie then looked Ethan. "Let's go." Cal smiled at a tired Ethan as he began to push the bed with Connie and Charlie.

As they wheeled Ethan through cubicles. All staff looked at them with expressions of fear and others but they were also supportive. Max hugged Robyn as she cried. Jacob looked at Connie with sad eyes. Connie looked back at him, trying to hold back her tears.

"We're going to take you up to theatre so they can remove the bullet. I'm going to be with you. Every step." Cal spoke to Ethan as he held his hand while they wheeled him through the department. "I love you, Nibbles. You're going to be fine." Cal smiled.

" _Fine...Fine...Fine._ " That word echoed at Ethan as he stared ahead, completely zoned out and dazed. His life flashed before his eyes from being born, to seeing his real mother for the first time, to his first cuddle with Cal, to learning to walk, to getting his first glasses, to starting secondary school, to graduating university and medical school, to starting his job at the ED after his previous jobs, to finally, seeing Jeff.

Ethan continued to stare until his eyes shut.

"Ethan?" Cal worried. He looked at his ECG. No pulse. Ethan's heart stopped. "Ethan!" Cal raised his voice.

"He's gone into cardiac arrest. Let's get him back to small resus!" Connie demanded urgently. Ethan was wheeled back small resus. Cal let go of Ethan's hand and started chest compressions as Ethan was still being wheeled back.

"Mind your backs please!" Charlie demanded. Everyone stood in shock. This was their friend as well as work colleague. They entered small resus again.

"Let's get the defibrillator ready." Connie spoke as she placed pads of Ethan's chest. "His spleen must of ruptured." Connie stated. Cal look at her in horror. Ethan was bleeding internally. His wound must have reopened.

"Come on. Stay with me, Ethan. Please." Cal begged with tears as he performed chest compressions on Ethan still.

Connie was loading up the defibrillator whilst Charlie stood by in case he was needed.

"Charging, 150. Clear." Connie warned as Cal stepped back. Ethan's body jolted as Connie pressed the button. No output still. Cal quickly continued chest compressions.

"Charing again. 150. Clear." Connie repeated as Cal once again stepped back. Ethan's body jolted again but they were still struggling to revive Ethan.

The kept going for forty minutes, still refusing to give up on Ethan.

"We're gonna have to call it soon." Charlie spoke softly in Connie's ear.

"He's lost so much blood." Connie whispered with a trembling voice, as she looked at Cal. "He's losing more blood then we can get in." Cal looked up at Connie as he kept performing compressions.

"No! We are not giving up. Get me 10 grams of adrenaline." Cal demanded but no one was moving. "What are you doing?" Cal almost snapped.

"Cal-" Connie placed a hand over the trolley onto Cal's arm as she was interrupted by Cal.

"We can't give up." Cal gritted his teeth in anger.

"He's gone." Connie continued as she lightly gripped Cal's arm. Cal slowed down on chest compressions, looked down at the Ethan then back at Connie.

"Time of death 21.06." Connie confirmed the death as Cal stepped back slowly removing his gloves. He threw them to the side then stormed out the room with Charlie and Connie watching the door then looking back down at Ethan as he laid there shirtless and with a tracheal tube

 **I tried to make this as emotional as I could but I'm not really good at it. Also, sorry if there are some medical errors.**

 **One more chapter to go: How is Cal going to cope?**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey all,**

 **I am loving your guesses, they are really nice to read and great theories on what could happen : )**

 **I made a slight mistake with chapter 4: Ethan was in small resus and resus was next to it, opposite cubicles and he was wheeled through cubicles as he was meant to be going up to theatre with the lift in reception so they would of had to of wheeled past reception, so whoops. Sorry about that. For some reason I get small resus and HDU (the room in cubicles) confused with each other.**

 **Anyway, last chapter : )**

Cal stormed out of small resus. He paced up and down outside the two resus's. Eyes steaming with tears and anger. He breathed heavily until he punched his first hard into the wall. Max came round the corner and saw Cal losing strength in his legs. Max ran up to him a caught Cal as he collapsed. He hugged Cal and lowered him to the floor as Cal let out a heartbroken scream and cry.

"I've got you." Max closed his eyes as he whispered. Cal continued to cry. All of their friends came round the corner from reception and watched Cal and Max with lumps in their throats and tears in their eyes. They may of lost a friend but Cal lost a brother, his only brother.

Charlie walked out of small resus. Max looked up at Charlie and gave him a light head sideways shake. Charlie inhaled a quiet breath as his eyes stayed red. Charlie walked over to their staff.

"Alright everyone. Take a breath." Charlie's voice almost broke. But he wanted to clear everyone. Everyone cleared but Lily. She stood there, looking at Cal then looking at small resus letting out a huge sigh whilst tears also ran down her face. She placed a hand on Max's back as he loosened his hug on Cal and immediately hugged Lily. Max got up and slowly walked away. Lily was Ethan's close friend, it was only right that she was there with Cal.

In small resus, Connie stared down at Ethan's lifeless body.

"When I said that you are a credit to this department. I meant it." Connie whispered. "You remain a credit, Ethan. You're a hero." Connie looked up as she tried to hold back a tear. "We will be there for Cal. Help him when he is lost." Connie let the tears roll now. "You've done your bit for him. Now you can rest." Connie cried. "Let's get you cleaned up."

Outside small resus, Lily and Cal sat on the floor, leaning against the wall next to each other.

"He saved my life. He should of let me have that bullet." Cal whispered. Lily looked at him. "This was a revenge act and Ethan got in the middle of it."

"He's your brother. He would of done anything for you." Lily spoke.

"Peter was right, I didn't deserve him." Cal sighed. "I grew up making his life hell. He worked hard and just had everything handed to me." Cal's voice broke. Lily placed her hand on his shoulder.

"You need to see him." Lily sighed. She didn't know what else to say.

"I can't, Lily." Cal began to cry.

"I'll be with you." Lily smiled. Cal looked at her and nodded sadly. Connie walked out.

"I've cleaned him up." Connie had puffy eyes from crying.

"Can I see him?" Cal asked as he stood up as did Lily.

"Are you sure?" Connie asked. Cal nodded. "Okay. He'll be sent for a post mortem soon."

"Thank you." Cal sighed. Connie walked away. Cal stood outside small resus. Lily walked up to him and held his hand. They both walked in and saw Ethan laying flat and was cleaned up but still had the ends of the tracheal tube in his mouth.

"You know that he has be left how he died so try not to move him." Lily voice almost broke. Cal nodded lightly then walked to Ethan's side. Lily went to the other side.

"My little brother. My hero." Cal stroked Ethan's face with his finger. "I'm sorry with how I treated you when we were younger. I'm sorry that you got little appreciation for all your hard work but deep down, I was proud of you. I still am proud of you." Cal's tears fell. Lily wiped her tears with her finger. "Look after mum, okay?" Cal choked. Mentioning their mum started to set him off. Lily walked round the other side of the bed and hugged him again.

"Let it out. Don't fight it." Lily cried as did Cal. Connie walked in with two people in scrubs.

"Cal. Post mortem are ready." Connie spoke softly. Cal stopped hugging Lily and looked at Connie.

"No." Cal refused. "No, you're not taking him. He's not going to be poked and prodded then placed in a fridge." Cal cried.

"Cal, you know we have to do it." Connie sighed.

"No!" Cal shouted. "I won't let you!" Cal stood in front of Ethan's bed.

"Cal, if you don't calm down, I will have to call security and I really don't want to do that." Connie tried to hold back her tears. She had so many mixed emotions.

"Don't take my brother. Please!" Cal stifled his cries. The two men in scrubs started to walk round the bed but Cal grabbed one of them and pinned him against the wall.

"Cal!" Connie shouted. By this point security ran in and pulled Cal away.

"No! Get off me!" Cal screamed as he was being dragged out of the room. "Ethan!" Cal shouted as his brother was wheeled away from him for the final time. Cal lost all his energy and fell to the floor. "ETHAAAAAAAN!" Cal cried.

Cal suddenly snapped his eyes open and raised his head, waking up instantly. He was in the staffroom, on the sofa. He looked around. His eyes were wet. He head hurt. What was going on?

"Cal." Cal heard a voice, he looked across the sofa and saw Ethan sitting there, healthy and uninjured.

"Ethan!" Cal jumped up and hugged his brother tightly. "It was a dream. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you." Cal whispered. Ethan stood there confused as Cal still hugged him. What was his brother on about? Cal stopped hugging him.

"I better let Mrs Beauchamp know you're awake. Tell her that you are probably a little concussed." Ethan spoke as he shined a torch in Cal's eyes. Cal brushed his torch away from him.

"Huh?" Cal asked. Ethan put his torch away.

"Max was sweeping, he was showing off in front of this girl, swung his broom and hit you as you were walking past. Knocked you clean out." Ethan answered, he couldn't help but smile. "Quite comical, if you think about." Cal lightly chuckled at Ethan, then touched his head lightly. "But yes, you have a bruise on your head to prove it."

"I don't care. I'm just glad you are okay." Cal smiled.

"Of course, I'm okay. Hurt my back at bit carrying you here." Ethan smirked as did Cal.

"When you finish your shift, let's grab a takeaway, grab some beers and go home." Cal smiled.

"Yes okay. That sounds fine." Ethan smiled. "I think Mrs Beauchamp gave you the rest of the day off. You were asleep for most of it anyway." Ethan spoke. Cal nodded. "Right, I better get on. Finish this last ten minutes of my shift." Ethan spoke then went to walk out the staffroom. Cal sat back on the sofa.

"Ethan." Cal called him. Ethan turned around.

"Yes, Cal?" Ethan responded. Cal had so many things to say but he didn't want confuse Ethan further. He'll explain it all later.

"Thank you." Cal smiled.

"You don't deserve me sometimes." Ethan winked then left.

"No I don't. But you're stuck with me." Cal spoke softly then smiled.

 **Got ya ; )**

 **Like I would kill Ethan off. Pffft :p**

 **Anyway, hope you liked it. Thank you for all your feedback. Hopefully more inspiration will strike soon If I'm not too busy with my book. See you all soon : )**


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